It always used to bother me, how mind-bogglingly complex my life was, from a lot of aspects. Sometimes, the complexity was too much to handle and it would affect the way I think and act in totally unconnected aspects of my life. Its strange how no one knew or could know all the pieces at once.

I have always found movie characters shallow – they are always clichéd in some way – never seemed to reflect the complexity of real life in any non trivial way. Very rarely could I allow myself to see the connection between movie characters and the way I see the ‘real’ world.

I just finished watching Stanley Kubrick’s ‘Eyes Wide Shut’ and I have to pretty much surrender to the genius of this film. Its something that captured an aspect of the complexity of life, in a very real way. I don’t have a word or a phrase to describe that part of life – but it is real for me. And it scared me that someone could express it as clearly as that. Scared and amazed me. It’s a wonderful movie and one that is very hard to appreciate in all its layers.

I am beginning to realize that I have developed in myself a healthy though-style in the constructive culture of doubt that we often call science. I can think scientifically – though saying that does not mean very much because there many interpretations of what ‘thinking scientifically’ is. However I cannot think very clearly in terms of people - the way behavior of individuals is affected by interaction with other individuals even though I can presume to understand the individuals in isolation. It always amazes me when someone can do that or at least portray that in a way that I that I find interesting.

The Christmas break has started and Bloomington is beautiful these days. Snow all around – my first time with snow. I guess saying that Bloomington is beautiful these days is not saying much at all because Bloomington is always beautiful.

I got my copy of Douglas Hofstadter’s ‘Godel Escher Bach’ the other day. I think it is going to say many things that I know intuitively but may never be able to express as beautifully as Hofstadter. And that, in some sense, is the whole point.

I have also got interested in physics again after many many years. I don’t know if I will have the luxury to study it – but the interest is back. This time however it looks like I may focus more rationally and more thoroughly on quantum mechanics and the quantum field theory.

I am also beginning to be of the opinion that computer science is a foundational science in the study of the universe as is mathematics and physics. Actually computer science is probably an incorrect description of this foundational science and it should be more of a science of automata – such that it can be described separately from mathematics, though the line is blurry in many places. Its doesn’t really matter – there seems to be little value in the effort of compartmentalizing computer science and mathematics.

I have also, in the past few days, got interested in this board game called GO. It has simpler rules that chess. However it leads to very complex patterns and different notions of strategy compared to chess or many other board games that I know of.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Go_board_game 

And finally I have an update to my Enc (file encryption program). The last version was buggy because it would drop files sometimes. For some reason I cant seem to write this program well at all. I always end up writing this one badly and keep getting unhappy with it. Even this version isn’t very good. It certainly isn’t good in terms of doing good exception handling and all – but even on other aesthetic levels I don’t like it. I wonder what it is about the nature of this program that causes that. Of course, if you are afraid of using it for protection – it is rather usable, so don’t worry, too much. The protected files that are generated are atleast as strong or weak as the protection that is guaranteed for 128bit Rijndael (AES) encryption.

Download Enc v0.3 (src and binary)

Marvin: "I am at a rough estimate thirty billion times more intelligent than you. Let me give you an example. Think of a number, any number."

Zem: "Er, five."

Marvin: "Wrong. You see?"

The mattress was much impressed by this and realised that it was in the presence of a not unremarkable mind.

-- Douglas Adams, Life, the Universe and Everything

LIFF (n.)

A book, the contents of which are totally belied by its cover. For instance, any book the dust jacket of which bears the words. 'This book will change your life'.